I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
