Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
