Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
