i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck