Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
New Dating App in Dallas For Only The Most Ambitious and Attractive Singles
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.