Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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