is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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