im drinking this country out of the recession.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
You may now shotgun with the bride
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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