3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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