its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
