you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
