trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
