the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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