It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
