Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
