i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize