This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
whose ass print is on the piano?
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Randomize