dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
