great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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