My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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