What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
