I swear she didn't look like that last week.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
