just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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