i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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