I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
