also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
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Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
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There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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