The panties match.
I'll be right there.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
