That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
