I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
