Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize
