okay pat passed out under dana's car
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
