Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
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i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
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the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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