I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm passing your future prison.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
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