sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
