i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
He uses pillows to masturbate.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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