It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
