Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
She's the barista slut.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
