A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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