this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
