did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
