so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
