$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize