She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Randomize
