I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Randomize
