Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Randomize