i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
and eventually we just all took our pants off
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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