Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Randomize
