HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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