two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Randomize
