Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
It's just like the Real World with babies
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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