i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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